Secrets of A Baseball Groupie

Many people wonder how women get to such a low point in their lives where they decide “Hey, let me whore myself out to baseball players!”. Who are these women? Groupies are typically average looking women who come to ball games not just to watch, but to attract the attention of any player that will turn their head. Some players define groupies as women who collect professional athletes.
What do these “groupies” hope to get out of their little rendezvous with these men? The answers are varied. Some just want a good fling, others wanted to be reminded that they are “sexy”, and most just want the attention, glamor, and fame that comes with being associated with these athletes. I know a couple of women personally that hook up with these men and then expect for a relationship to develop, and these are married men with children. Do these women honestly expect that a player like Alex Rodriguez, Manny Ramirez, or Hanley Ramirez will drop their wives and families to go be with a loosey goosey? I wouldn’t think so, but they do.
What kind of strategies to these women have? One of my girlfriend’s spilled the beans and told me her methods. Groupies usually travel in packs of twos or threes. They then attempt to attract attention. They will typically get seats near the 1st or 3rd baseline to make sure they are seen; they will also try stalking the player parking lots and clubhouse. Typically, these women will do whatever possible to find out what bars or clubs the players frequent or what hotel they are staying in and then make an appearance. At the ballpark, because the women are some distance from the ball players, they will try to exaggerate characteristics players find attractive. You will most likely see loads of make up, very revealing tops, and incredibly low and tight shorts. This makes it easier for them to be picked out of a crowd. Before you know it, a player may make the sign for her to give him her number and you will see the groupie swaying to the bat boy with a piece of paper containing her digits. My girl friend claims this isn’t the only reason she attends games, but then again, she won’t admit that she is a groupie, either.
What do players think of groupies? While players may enjoy a groupies attention and company, you can be most certain that the respect they hold for these women is null and void. A groupie can easily be compared to a prostitute. Many players see in the groupies a sexual relationship with out attachments. Groupies come with their risks too, and many veteran baseball players are aware of this. Most groupies have STD’s, such as my girl friend who has HPV, amongst other things, but swears that it isn’t contagious…. Other risks are scam artists posing as groupies, extortionists; these women may get pregnant and then demand child support, ruin your marriage, and forever tarnish your name in baseball. What price are these players willing to pay for a piece of @$$? Many players try to avoid groupies for this reason, but it should be noted that many players avoid these women simply out of faithfulness to their partners or with concern that these women will distract them from playing baseball and hurt their performance.
So what about this groupie epidemic, do you ever think that it will cease? I doubt it. Not as long as these ball players are making the salaries that they do. Not as long as men behave like dogs and these women behave like hookers. On any given night outside of Dolphin Stadium, you will find anywhere from 10 – 20 groupies waiting in hopes that they will go home with a player. Not bad for a team with the lowest attendance in the league.

11 Comments

Filed under baseball, Real Life, Sports

11 responses to “Secrets of A Baseball Groupie

  1. darkship

    Guess I never thought about it. Sure you have your suspisions that it goes on and every once and a while you here a gal say I’m pregnant by(insert player here) but as long as men think with the wrong bidy part and don’t care about what may happen to them or their marriages, if married, it’s going to be a problem. I don’t get it though. If i’m a happily married man why woudl I risk it all for a one night, or shall we say one series, stand!

    Good thoughts though. I enjoy reading both yours and Mario’s blogs

  2. I KNOW WHO YOUR TALKING ABOUT!!!

  3. LOL

    No, there is another one.

  4. amanda

    Most groupies have stds? B.S. Most groupies I know wear no make-up,baseball hats and jeans and tee-shirts. Your article is a joke. Get a clue.

  5. You’re entitled to your opinion, but honey, I’ve seen this all first hand.Take a trip down to Miami and let’s see who needs to get a clue.

  6. Nudge

    I find your atricle completely biased, incorrect and to be honest, just a tad bitter.

    Firstly, to state that groupies are an “epidemic” is incorrect – groupies have been around forever in all areas of life, I doubt it’s on the increae and it’s not a new thing at all. Groupies do not necessarily want to sleep with their idols, although it would appear most do, many just want autographs, or to have a conversation, any form of contact. Groupie is often just another word for fan.

    Most importantly, I am appalled by your narrow-minded attitude. I quote:

    “these women may get pregnant and then demand child support, ruin your marriage, and forever tarnish your name in baseball. ”

    - If a man cheats on his wife, he has ruined his own marriage. Yes, both parties have a responsibility, but if you can’t remain faithful to your partner you shouldn’t have one. Men have an equal responsibility to their children women do, they don’t get to skive off responsibility for their children just because they don’t have a womb. If a man wants the reputation of a faithful husband, it’s his job to maintain it.

    You also compared groupies to prostitutes – why is it that the prostitue is always to blame, never the man seeking prostitution?

    I’m sorry your girlfreind has contracted an STI and that (according to you this is because) she has been unfaithful, however this is absolutely no basis for claiming all groupies have STD’s. There are a number of way for people to obtain STIs or STDs, condoms aren’t 100% effective, it’s also very common to have to symptoms, especially with for example chlamydia – which over 10% of under 25′s have. It seems your personal experience has clouded your judgement on the issue.

  7. Let’s just get one thing straight, Nudge. The only reason your comment is being approved is because you are obviously a complete moron. (Oops… did I offend you?) I want everyone to see how much of an idiot one can make themselves out to appear like by not paying attention to close and obvious detail.
    The only experience I have with groupies is seeing them at over 20 ball games that I attended in the 2007 season. Having conversations with them about their many rendevous with these players and watch them as they put on their game face to try to lure these guys in.
    I am not a disgruntled guy named Joe whose whorish girlfriend betrayed him by doing the nasty with Derek Jeter and then contracted a rare case of herpes.
    I am a happily married mother of one that just happens to love baseball, attend a lot of games, and observe everything that goes on around her.
    While your comment had a couple of valid points (don’t get excited, there are only a couple), you took this article for a lot more than what it actually is.
    This blog is written by me and displays my opinions. I do not write for CNN and I do not have to write compltely factual posts with statistics and the whole nine yards.
    I simply write about what I see and I call ‘em like I see ‘em. Groupies = attention starved women.
    It is what it is. Sorry if you don’t like it.

  8. ark

    i think your are just a jelous woman that dont have anithing to do unless judjing other people and their lifestyle

  9. Wow, your grammar is atrocious!

    No wonder you felt the need to leave such a ridiculously stupid and invalid comment… you’re uneducated and you are upset because you did a google search for “groupie” and instead of getting your usually spread of porn, you fell upon my article.

    Well, my friend, I’m sorry you can’t get laid … but that’s really just not my problem.

  10. To the pathetic idiot, ‘ark’, who insists on having a flame war on my blog…. grow some balls and email me personally if you have something to say… or are you afraid that I will make you cry?

    Do yourself a favor, sweetheart, hang yourself. :)

  11. To the people that insist on commenting on this blog solely to try to insult me, please… grow some balls and email me directly.

    It’s so pathetic to try to leave an anonymous comment so you will never have to have direct contact with me.

    Please… grow up.